them
pronoun
UK/ðəm/US/ðəm/
Used to refer to a group of people or things previously mentioned or easily identified.
Example Sentences
I saw them at the park yesterday.
Please give the books to them when you see them.
She invited them to her birthday party.
They couldn't believe that they lost them in the crowd.
He told them about his new job.
We need to meet with them to discuss the project.
She looked for them everywhere but couldn't find them.
The teacher handed the assignments to them after class.
Thesaurus
Synonyms
How to Use
Used to indicate the object form referring to people or entities.Primarily, this pronoun appears as the object of a sentence or clause, signifying the receivers of an action or the ones being referred to. For example, in “I saw them at the store,” it points to the people (or person) encountered. In modern usage, it can also serve as a singular, gender-neutral pronoun: “Ask them if they need any help,” which respects someone’s identity without specifying gender. Always ensure that the pronoun clearly connects to its antecedent—whether that’s a known group, a named individual, or a generic reference like ‘someone.’ If confusion arises (e.g., multiple groups or persons were mentioned), clarifying with additional context or specifying the name can resolve ambiguity. Grammatically, “them” follows verbs and prepositions: “I gave the books to them,” “Please notify them about the change.”
Alternatives
Different pronouns suit various numbers or cases. If you refer to a single person who identifies with ‘he/him’ pronouns, use “him” accordingly; for ‘she/her,’ go with “her.” For first-person references, “me” (singular) or “us” (plural) applies. Likewise, “you” covers second-person references, whether singular or plural in many dialects of English. When referencing a larger group that includes yourself, “us” might be appropriate. If you’re switching to a reflexive form (indicating the action turns back on the subject), “themselves” fits for plural usage—“They prepared themselves for the test”—and can also function for singular nonbinary use, such as “They prepared themselves for the interview.” Substituting synonyms like “that person,” “those people,” or rephrasing for clarity can help avoid repeating “them” multiple times if it starts feeling repetitive.
Writing
In writing, “them” functions smoothly as an objective pronoun for groups or singular non-gendered references. If your text repeatedly mentions multiple parties, ensure the reader can distinguish who ‘them’ refers to. Sometimes, rewriting a sentence—naming the individuals or using alternative phrasing—reduces potential confusion. Particularly in formal or academic work, define pronouns early if you’re addressing an individual who uses they/them to avoid confusion about number.If you’re adhering to traditional grammar rules, some style guides once discouraged singular ‘them,’ but modern usage increasingly accepts it to foster inclusivity. When dealing with official, legal, or academic documents, check the preferred style guide, as conventions vary. In general, clarity and respect should guide your choice. By introducing the person or group, confirming pronouns if needed, and then consistently applying them, you maintain coherence throughout your text.
Casual Conversation
In everyday conversation, “them” makes speech natural and efficient, especially when you’re unsure of someone’s gender or referring to a group: “I just texted them to confirm,” or “Where did you see them last?” This flexible usage works well for spontaneous dialogue, ensuring you don’t have to pause for specifics. If you find yourself switching between multiple references—friends, family members, co-workers—context cues often keep everything straight. In close-knit circles where everyone knows each other’s pronouns, using “them” for an individual helps respect nonbinary identities or maintain privacy if details aren’t needed. Overall, it’s a straightforward pronoun that clarifies who the object is in a conversation without overloading your speech with reintroductions or extraneous details. If confusion pops up—like two different groups in the same sentence—quickly specify: “I asked the group from work, but I still need to talk to them from next door.”
Etymology
This pronoun stems from Old Norse influence, particularly from words like “þeim,” which entered Middle English as a result of Norse and Anglo-Saxon linguistic intermingling. Early forms included variations like “theim” and “tham.” Over centuries, as English pronunciation and orthography shifted, “them” emerged as the dominant spelling. Its Germanic roots align with other pronouns in the same family— “they,” “their,” “them”—collectively known as the third-person plural forms in modern English. Over time, as social awareness of gender identity evolved, “them” also developed a recognized function as a singular, gender-neutral pronoun, expanding its role beyond strictly referring to multiple people. This linguistic adaptability showcases the evolving nature of pronouns in reflecting cultural and communicative needs.
